::sands of time:: / Tuesday, November 14, 2006
i'm crying. again - as i write this post. one of the very last post i have on the days we had in p4-6. those wonderful years and friends- i'm gonna miss them so much. especially jinyin, shiren, jean and jieru. great friends going to another school. but no, i'm not crying totally for them. i'm crying because everything is happening around me now - things that i wanted to come later. and i can't handle it. i'll state:
- friends, teachers. i'm gonna miss them so much memories last, i hope it lasts forever
- him. if i do see him again, i'll either cry, ignore him (run, more like) or just hit him hard. it's painful just sending pointless emails to an ignorant person. but..you just can't let go.
- him and her. another him, of course. sigh. i don't know if it's jealousy or what but i just can't take it. it's just, perhaps a very close friendship.
- him and her2. i've asked another someone for advice. i just cry because her2 cries. you know that beautiful romance blooming between them, is shattering. and i can't bear it.
it's number 3 and 4 that i hate the most. the ones that are causing my tears to overflow. i won't be meeting the 4 next year. and the year after and so on. i think i'm gonna shatter. sand crumbles and fall through your hands, and it falls. you look at it, rather beautiful and sophisticated isn't it. that sand - represents the time that you'll never catch. or turn back. only the memories left - of how that handful of sand fell through your hands, leaving your hands grainy. the only momentos left. that's life. that's all you can get through your experience.
i want to stop those tears. but i can't. because i like them too much. the hims and the hers. the sands of time. the sands of time that can never be forgotten. goodbye.
/ihopped at
4:31 AM
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